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Deadliest warriors of all history

Dovahkiin vs Corvo Attano

Dovahkiin info:

Height: 6 foot 5 (as a Nord)

Weight: 280lbs (as a Nord)

Weapons: Daedric Sword and Shield, Daedric Bow

Armour: Full Dragon bone Armour

Powers: Dragon Shouts (for this battle Unrelenting Force, Fire Breath and Dragon Aspect only)

Strengths: The Dragonborn of legend the Dovahkiin possesses greater strength and durability compared to others of his race as well as the other races in Tamriel. Upon that as well the Dovahkiin can absorb the souls of slain Dragons to become even more powerful and learn new Dragon Shouts.

Weakness: Whilst possessing his many strengths and the soul of a Dragon the Dovahkiin is not immortal and can fall in combat if damaged enough. Since I am using the default Dovahkiin he has very little talent in Magic preferring to rely on his Bow for ranged attacks as well as Healing Potions for dealing with wounds.

Corvo Attano info:

Height: 5 foot 11

Weight: Roughly 160lbs

Weapons: Collapsible Sword, Flintlock Pistol, Crossbow, Trap Mines

Powers: Outsiders Powers (for this battle Blink, Devouring Swarm and Windblast only)

Strengths: Master of stealth and assassination Corvo can wipe out an entire building of armed guards lethally and nonlethally without any of them knowing he was there. If he somehow messes up or decides to go loud Corvo is also highly skilled in Sword combat and is a good shot with his Pistol and Crossbow.

Weaknesses: Being mainly a stealth based fighter Corvo is fairly brittle durability wise only able to take two or three major hits before succumbing to his wounds so he either has to rely on his Outsiders Powers to keep out of harm’s way or on his Healing Poultice’s to deal with his wounds.

Battle begin!

Raising his Sword the Dovahkiin let out a loud final battle cry as he drove his Weapon into the final Thalmor Soldiers chest, impaling the Altmer Warrior to the cold ground ending his life instantly. Drawing his Sword out of the corpse with a low grunt the Nord let out heavy pants as he got his breath back, he had not anticipated the Thalmor ambush but like so many before them the Altmer fell to his Sword, Bow and Shouts without much trouble.

Lowering his Sword to sheath it the Dovahkiin suddenly stopped when he heard a rustling in the tree behind him followed by the sound of a Blade being drawn. With another battle cry the Nord quickly spun around raising his Shield just in time to block his attacker’s strike, the lithe Assassin moving with the block rolling along the huge Shield before using it to jump high in the air landing deftly in a crouch.

Turning to face who had attacked him the Nord stopped puzzled at the image of the Assassin, he was wearing Armour that he had never seen before and his mask was almost mechanical but not in the manner of the Dwemer. Deciding that his attacker was most likely just another Dark Brotherhood Assassin who had taken the contract on his life he would just deal with him like the many others “YOL TUUR SHUL!!!” he bellowed blasting a wall of searing flames from his mouth at the Assassin only for him to suddenly disappear and reappear in a nearby tree making the Dovahkiin growl with annoyance.

Using his mask to zoom in on his target Corvo analysed any weak points he could find as the Nord started to pace around in frustration obviously not wanting to make a brash move that could have left him open to attack. Grinning slyly under his mask Corvo conjured his Devouring Swarm power before summoning a large plague of Rats at the Dovhakiin’s feet making him jump startled at the sudden appearance of the Rats.

The Nord’s shock quickly turned to mirth though as he watched the Rats feebly try to bite through his armour only breaking their teeth in his greaves “is that the best you can do? Sending mere Skeevers after me?” the Nord mocked before raising one of his feet only to bring it back down crushing several of the Rats heads sending the rest scattering to which they quickly dissipated.

Scowling at how his first attack was so easily deflect despite the fact that the Rat Swarm was capable of reducing full grown men to puddles of blood Corvo jumped down from the tree and began to circle the Dovahkiin to which the Nord did the same back keeping in constant tandem with the Assassin. Unsheathing his Sword Corvo again started to analyse any weak spots he could find on his target soon finding slight weaknesses in the joints of the Nord’s Armour as well as noticing that his neck was greatly exposed between his Cuirass and his Helmet.

Quickly planning a means of attack Corvo cast his hand at the Nord sending a powerful Windblast in his direction momentarily knocking the Dragonborn off balance before using Blink to shoot towards him with his sword poised. Staggering back the Dovahkiin anticipated the attack having suffered many a sneak attack in the past and was more than ready for it “FUS!!!” he shouted sending a small but strong enough blast of energy from his mouth to send Corvo flying back making him it the ground hard before he began rolling until he hit a tree.

Grunting with pain as his back slammed against the tree Corvo slowly forced himself to his feet before freezing as an Arrow narrowly missed his head by inches Blinking away just in time to dodge another Arrow as it collided with the tree next to the first one. Notching another Arrow the Dovahkiin took aim as Corvo suddenly stopped and drew his Crossbow taking aim himself firing the same moment the Dragonborn did causing the Arrow and Bolt to collide mid-air cancelling each other out.

Loading another Bolt faster than the Nord could notch another Arrow Corvo fired again striking the Bow right out of the Dovahkiin’s hands making him exclaim as the Bolt dug deep into his hand. Exclaiming in pain the Nord dropped his Bow and wrenched the Bolt out of his hand flexing his fingers to make sure that they still could move before another Bolt skimmed off his Armour dangerously close to the weak spot on his neck.

Redrawing his Sword the Dragonborn let out a thunderous bellow of a battle cry charging at Corvo who in turn used his Blink power to disappear from sight “FACE ME YOU COWARD!!!” the Nord roared as his charged for ground to a halt glancing around furiously in search for his opponent. “YOL! YOL! YOL!” he bellowed sending small blasts of fire at the nearby trees stripping them of their leaves to check if the Assassin was hiding there as well as limiting his places to conceal himself. As he set each tree aflame the Nord then suddenly felt a presence behind him before something being attached to his Armour.

As the Dovahkiin turned around to swing his Weapon he let out a roar of pain as the Razor Mine Corvo had stuck to his back went off sending bladed wires whipping along his body from behind. Thankfully the Dragon bone of the Armour was thick enough to take the hit whilst the bare parts of the Nords arms and legs suffered deep cuts but not deep enough to sever any major arteries. Hissing as his limbs burned with pain the Dragonborn drew a Health Potion quickly downing a large mouthful of the elixir before tossing the bottle aside as the cuts on his arms and legs healed over stemming the bleeding.

As the bottle shattered on the ground a low crack of a gunshot rang out through the air followed by the Nord exclaiming as a bullet shattered against his Helmet mere millimetres from his eye, the Dragon bone of the Helm cracking and splintering slightly as the Dragonborn recoiled from the shot. Reloading another shot Corvo took aim again firing only for the Nord to raise his Shield in time to block the blast and before the Assassin could reload again he was blasting back with another Fire Breath shout Blinking away just in time so that he wasn’t completely incinerated.

Reappearing on a cliff ledge above his target Corvo briskly patted down his jacket quelling the embers smouldering on the clothing before turning to reassess the situation. The Nord’s Armour was proving too thick for his Bullets and Mines to break through and his Shouts put him on par with his own Outsider Powers. Extending his Sword again Corvo sighed as he realized that a full on assault was going to be the only way to get past the Nords defences, Blinking back down to the ground the Assassin now stood before the Dragonborn, both combatants with their Weapons poised and ready to kill.

Being the first to move Corvo sent a Windblast towards the Nord hoping to knock him off balance and open him up for a quick life ending stab but unfortunately for the Assassin the Dragonborn had the same idea sending the first two words of the Unrelenting Force Shout at him. The Blast and Shout cancelling each other out leaving both men charging at each other unhindered, the Nord swinging his Sword hard at Corvo’s neckline to try and get a quick decapitation only for the Assassin to drop down and slide straight under his feet knocking him off balance as well as hacking at the openings in his Greaves drawing blood along his legs.

“YOL!” the Dragonborn bellowed in response searing the ground beneath them as Corvo rolled out of the way, evading the flames Corvo then sent another wave of Rats as a distraction before Blinking forward to grab hold of the Nords shoulder with his free hand raising his Sword to plunge it into the open space between the Cuirass and the shoulder Plates. “FUS ROH!” the Dovahkiin roared before Corvo had the chance to strike through sending him flying back to which he luckily managed to Blink his way to a nearby tree before he landed.

Snarling as he watched Corvo hop down from the tree and extend his Blade again the Dovahkiin decided that the combat had gone on long enough “MUL QAH DIIV!” he shouted to which his body was promptly encased in spectral Armour mirroring his Dragon Bone Armour “face me Assassin! My life or yours, one of us dies this day!” he called out to which Corvo seemed to agree as he made to motion to retreat.

Time seemed to slow down as the Nord and Assassin squared off against each other and then in perfect synchrony they made their moves. The Dragonborn charging forward with his Shield in front of him as Corvo utilized a Windblast to propel himself high in the air for an aerial attack, rushing down to bypass the Shield and carve out the Nords throat in one fluid motion. That was the plan until the Nord ducked down to slide down on his knees raising his Shield to block Corvo’s Sword whilst thrusting his own up at the Assassin.

The sound of the Blade tearing through flesh and bone echoed through the air as Corvo froze in place, his body impaled completely on the Nords Sword as blood began to pour from under his mask, the Assassin coughing it up as his internal organs were destroyed. Lowering his Sword the Dragonborn then placed his foot against Corvo’s chest using it to kick his now lifeless body to the floor before sheathing his Blade, then with a small nod of respect towards his opponent the Dragonborn turned and walked away heading towards Windhelm to tell Jarl Ulfric that the Thalmor in the area had been dealt with.

Winner: Dovahkiin

First I would like to apologize to the one who requested this fight over two years ago, I got too wrapped up in other matters and only just remembered this request. Whilst I loved the idea it was obvious that it would be a short fight, Corvo whilst being a master Assassin is far from masterful in close combat too used to fighting against Guards who are trained more in Firearms than Sword play and his Outsider Powers could only help him so far against the Dragonborn’s mighty Dragon Shouts.
DWOAH: Dovakhiin vs Corvo Attano
The sixteenth of my fan made Deadliest Warrior battles

In these I will be pitting my chosen warriors from all of history, be they real or fictional

The sixteenth battle: The Dovahkiin (TES 5: Skyrim) vs Corvo Attano (Dishonored)
Kost Adaar, my Inquisitor by Garchompisbeast
Kost Adaar, my Inquisitor

Race: Qunari

Class: Rogue

Specialization: Tempest

Level: 26

Weapon: The Fowl Wind

Armour: Armor of the Dragon Hunter, Keen Wyvern Vitaar

Romance: Josephine

Most selected followers: Dorian, Blackwall, Cole

Mages or Templars?: Mages

Personality: Varies from person to person, to some he is calm, friendly and loves a good laugh over a game of Diamondback, to others he is serious and mission focused willing to put his own life on the line to get the job done and to Josephine he's a romantic who's unashamed at making overly emotional gestures to show his affection for her.

Being generally anti-religion Kost was always sceptical about whether or not he was truly Andraste's chosen one, despite this though he wasn't against using the title if it meant helping those in need as it allowed those who would initially fear and despise him for his race to somewhat trust him. When it came to the Mage/Templar conflict Kost was all too quick to dive into defending the Mages siding with them completely throughout the war eventually ending with electing Leliana as the next Divine and imposing complete Mage freedom throughout Thedas.

Out of all the members of the Inquisition Kost gets along with his main team members the most never judging Dorian for his background or sexuality as well as helping the Tevinter Mage reconcile with his father as well as helping coax him into a relationship with the Iron Bull. When isn't spending his free time with Josephine or any other member of the Inquisition Kost is most likely sharing a good glass of wine and a old Tevinter story with Dorian as well as indulging his questions on Qunari anatomy to help in his relationship with Bull.

Having great admiration for the Grey Wardens Kost got on perfectly with Blackwall quickly forgiving him when it was revealed that he had lied about his Warden status and allowing the Wardens to remain in Orlais much to Blackwall's relief.

In Cole Kost found a little brother figure, someone to guide through life and teach about the world instead of shunning him away like almost everyone else helping him come to terms with his existence on Thedas as well as aiding him in becoming more human.

Like Cole Kost saw Sera almost as a little sister, an extremely childish and annoying one that brought him no end of headaches but a little sister all the same. Sharing her opinion on the upper class and rich snobs in general Kost would always oblige in assisting her in taking them down a peg as well as being a wingman in her many pranks around Skyhold.

When it came to the Iron Bull Kost had a rocky relationship with him at the start as he was against the Qun religion seeing it as just imprisonment masquerading as truth. his opinion of the Benhasrath soon lightened though when it was made apparent that Bull did not follow any of the Qun's strict rules to heart and was in fact one of the friendliest people he had ever met becoming a regular drinking and Dragon hunting buddy of his and helping him decide between his weakening faith in the Qun and the Chargers he had come to consider family. 

With Solas Kost had a fairly mixed relationship, he respected the Elf's knowledge of the Ancient Elves and the Fade but was quick to call him out on his snobbish behaviour whenever he felt Solas was talking down to him. There somewhat friendship effectively came to an end however when Kost chose to drink from the Well of Sorrows much to Solas's fury and when Solas disappeared after Corypheus's defeat Kost was more suspicious than saddened.

Vivienne was not a person that Kost got on with in anyway, the Mages constant demeaning attitude and superiority complex always rubbing the Qunari the wrong way along with her disdain for her own people. Most of the times Kost found himself having to speak to Vivienne ended in an argument between them about Mage rights and how Vivienne believed that Mages deserved their treatment despite being a Mage herself. 

Varric was Varric and like everyone else Kost had no problem getting along with the Dwarf.

Despite their rocky start Cassandra and Kost soon found common ground in their belief that the Chantry needed serious change along with the Seekers of truth. Through his coaxing Cassandra was encouraged to lead the Seekers on a new path away from their Mage abusing ways.

Whilst he and Scout Harding maintained a professional relationship Kost couldn't help but flirt with the Dwarven Scout whenever they spoke, this soon ended after Kost got to truly know Josephine though.

Having heard of Cullen after the news of the Kirkwall rebellion spread throughout Thedas Kost was determined to hate the ex-Templar for his actions towards Mage kind but after meeting him he found that he couldn't bring himself to dislike him. Instead of a close minded bigot he found Cullen to be a broken shell of a man trying desperately to right the wrongs of his past and kick his addiction to Lyrium to further distance himself from his Templar past which compelled the Qunari to help him overcome his addiction and value him as a skilled general of the Inquisition army.

Kost and Leliana had a fairly neutral and professional relationship and when the topic of a new Divine arose Kost elected Leliana to take Justinia's place as she intended to abolish the Circles of Magi and grant Mages throughout Thedas the freedom they deserved.

in Josephine Kost found the love of his life finding the Antivan both adorable and charming from the moment he had met her. 

If Dragon age: origins and Dragon age 2 characters worked together banter

Loghain and Sebastian

(After Loghain is recruited)
Sebastian: so Loghain, it’s an honour to meet the great Hero of the River Dane in person
Loghain: really now? I must say that’s the nicest thing any of you has said to me, normally it’s all accusations of murder
Sebastian: oh I know you killed King Cailan
Loghain: then why is it an honour to meet me then?
Sebastian: despite your sin you were still the hero that helped save Ferelden from Orlesian tyranny, I just hope your actions as a Grey Warden help you redeem yourself in the eyes of the Maker and your people
Loghain: I’m sure the Maker understands my actions and deems them as necessary as I did
(If Aveline is in the party)
Aveline: murder is never necessary
Loghain: neither was dooming your men to an unwinnable battle
Sebastian: there is no point fighting over what has already been done, Loghain can still find redemption as long as he sticks to the path of righteousness

(Random banter)
Loghain: so Sebastian, tell me, how strong is Starkhaven’s relationship with Orlais?
Sebastian: my city is comfortably neutral with the Orlesians, we have strong trade routes over the borders and we have yet to come to any major conflict over recent years, why do you ask?
Loghain: if it ever came to it would Ferelden have Starkhaven’s support on the occasion of another Orlesian invasion?
Sebastian: Starkhaven is a mere city state compared to Ferelden, the best we’d have to offer are troops but not our entire army
Loghain: that wasn’t my question, would Ferelden have Starkhaven’s support when Orlais tries another invasion
Sebastian: you seem all too sure that Orlais will try to conquer your country again
Loghain: I’m more than just sure, it is only a matter of time before Orlais marches on Ferelden again and I would like to know whether Starkhaven will be our allies or our enemies
Sebastian: we’ll just have to see if Orlais actually invades again and on what terms, either way I’m sure my home will remain neutral in the conflict
Loghain: that wasn’t the answer I was hoping for
Sebastian: well it’s the one I’m giving you

(Random banter in a Chantry)
Loghain: do you honestly believe I’m redeemable Sebastian?
Sebastian: of course, everyone is redeemable in the eyes of Andraste and the Maker as long as they’re truly sincere
Loghain: that is….good to here
Sebastian: having troubles of the conscience Loghain?
Loghain: I had to do what I did in the battle against the Darkspawn but what if the Maker sees it in the way everyone else does? What if I’m branded a murderer for trying to save my country? Becoming a Grey Warden has laid a death sentence on my head and what if serving isn’t enough to redeem my soul?
Sebastian: you can only wait and see Loghain, I cannot speak for the Maker, I can only pray for you if you’d like
Loghain: I’m sure you already do
If DA: Origins and DA2 characters worked together
The fifteenth of what I hope will be several of fan made dialogue scripts between the DA: origins and DA2 followers

This time it's Loghain and Sebastian, a very short one this time as I don't see Loghain and Sebastian talking all that much
Deadliest warriors of all history

Postal Dude vs Hatred Guy

Postal Dude info:

Height: Roughly 6 foot

Weight: Roughly 170lbs

Weapons: M16, Pistol, Machete, Molotov Cocktails, Scissors

Strengths: Skilled in most weapons. Uncaring for human life allowing him to show no mercy to those who attack him.

Weakness: Like all humans Postal Dude can only take so much damage before dying.

Hatred Guy info:

Height: 6 foot 4

Weight: Roughly 220 pounds

Weapons: AK-47, Pistol, Combat Knife, Grenades, Flamethrower

Strengths: Skilled in several different kinds of firearms and ballistic weaponry. Extremely high pain tolerance allowing him to barely react to most gunshots. Possesses a burning hatred of all life allowing him to never show mercy no matter who he is killing.

Weaknesses: Hatred Guy has one goal in life, to die and take as many people as possible with him, this means he is completely uncaring for his own life and makes no effort to defend himself when he is attacked simply fighting back as the bullets rain through him.

Battle begin!

“Once again your Pit-bull Terrier by the name of Champ has been claimed by Paradise Pound, if he is not picked up and the fine paid by the end of the day he will be put to sleep, yadda yadda yadda five hundred dollars, really should have used stronger stuff for his leash” Postal Dude muttered to himself reading the red pen lettered notice he had received through his letter box as he walked through the Mall to get to the Pound. This was the third time Champ had been caught this month and that was probably why the fine was so high this time forcing him to run several odd jobs that morning just to raise up enough funds.

Whistling as he reached the pound he shoved the door open pulling out the wad of ten dollar bills he had in his pockets “me again Greta, I’m here to pick up Champ again, he chewed straight through the belt I had used to tie him up, gonna use a chain next time I promise” he called out not paying attention to his surroundings as he counted the money until he tripped on something nearly landing flat on his face “what the fuck?”.

Looking down Postal Dude grimaced when he found that he had tripped over a bullet ridden body, the look of terror and agony still fresh on the man’s face “what the hell happened here?” he pondered glancing up to realize that the entire place had been shot to hell, bullet holes riddling every wall and surface along with dozens of corpses littering the floor “looks like someone had a bad day, wonder if those Al-Qaeda boys are acting up again” he added drawing his Pistol before he headed deeper into the Pound.

“No! Please don’t! Please!”

“Shut the fuck up maggot!” Hatred Guy snarled as he unloaded the last bullet in his AK magazine into the cowering receptionists head sneering with disgust as her brains splattered against the walls “filthy worthless worms” he spat in contempt as he reloaded his Assault Rifle. Having continued his rampage outside of his home town Hatred Guy had stumbled upon the town of Paradise and found its name deliciously ironic deciding to turn it into a living hell for all its inhabitants. Holstering his AK he turned to find one of the men he had shot when he stormed in trying desperately to crawl away making him growl with fury drawing his Combat Knife as he marched over to his victim, grabbing the man by his hair he dragged him up pressing the Knife to his throat.

“Somebody has issues” Postal Dude quipped as he walked in drawing Hatred Guy’s attention making him growl as he heartlessly slit his victims throat.

“Another worthless parasite”.

“Oh you’re funny, my old man used to call me that all the time, he’s dead now” Postal Dude retorted with a threatening smirk cocking his Pistol as Hatred Guy shoved his victims corpse to the ground and stood to tower over Postal Dude “so there’s two ways we could do this, you can step aside so that I can pick up my dog or I fill you full of lead, your choice shithead”.

Gritting his teeth in annoyance at Postal Dude’s cocky arrogance the taller man proceeded to sheathe his Knife back into his belt. Taking the action as the larger man standing down Postal Dude lowered his Pistol moving to walk around Hatred Guy only for him to grab him by the throat in a vice like grip before charging him across the room slamming him against the wall drawing his own Pistol and aiming it at the smaller man’s head “you honestly thought I’d let a filthy piece of shit like you walk away still breathing?!” the larger man snarled pulling the hammer back on his weapon “any last words before I end your miserable fucking existence?”.

“Yeah, you kiss your mother with that mouth?” Postal Dude quipped back firing a shot at Hatred Guy’s midsection skimming his side enough to make him recoil enough to move his weapon allowing Postal Dude the chance to Pistol whip the larger man hard across the brow making him stumble back with a loud curse. Deciding not to waste bullets on what seemed to be an easy kill with Hatred Guy gripping his forehead Postal Dude holstered his Pistol and draw his Machete from under his duster coat swinging it forward as Hatred Guy aimed his Pistol jamming the Blade straight through the Firearm rendering it useless as the muzzle shattered into pieces.

Letting out a frustrated growl Hatred Guy grabbed at Postal Dude’s arm as the smaller man swung again catching him by his forearm before the Machete could reach him, using his free arm he then redrew his Combat Knife taking a wild stab at the smaller man’s head only for him to duck out of the way causing the Blade to jam in to the wall nearly to the hilt “that’s it, struggle more, it just makes the kill all the more satisfying” Hatred Guy sneered wrenching his Knife out of the wall before throwing Postal Dude across the room causing him to crash into the Pounds waiting room’s chairs.

Postal Dude grunted with pain as he crashed through the chairs sending them flying hitting the floor hard “you are some kind of messed up” he groaned staggering to his feet and quickly swinging around with a Machete slash when he heard Hatred Guy marching towards him, his weapon just barely cutting across the larger man’s chest slicing through more shirt than skin. Grinning ferally Hatred Guy proceeded to grab Postal Dude by the throat again prompting the smaller man to slash at his arm to defend himself, jamming his Machete into the psychopath’s forearm causing him to exclaim with pain dropping the smaller man to draw his arm back ripping the Machete out of his flesh and throwing it aside.

Hitting the floor hard again Postal Dude quickly made a retreat drawing the several scissors he kept in his coat and throwing them at Hatred Guy as the larger man sheathed his Knife again and redrew his AK-47. Cackling wildly the large gothic man rained bullets at Postal Dude as he scrambled away, littering the walls with more holes firing wildly at his target “you can’t run forever maggot!” he roared as Postal Dude took refuge in a nearby supply room

“I’m not trying to run asshole” Postal Dude spat back as he drew a Molotov from under his coat along with his lighter igniting the vodka soaked rag and hurling it around the corner of the supply closets doorway gasping as a bullet nicked his arm as he did so. Hearing the tell-tale shatter of the Molotov shattering Postal Dude waited in hopes of hearing Hatred Guy burning to death but only constant gun fire rang through the air before suddenly stopping. Had he simply kept firing whilst he burned? That question was soon answered when a Grenade was thrown into the room “shit!”.

Diving to the other side of the storage room Postal Dude braced himself for the explosion, curling up into a tight ball in the corner covering his ears the Grenade went off destroying nearly everything on the shelves showering him in debris. With loud ringing in his ears Postal Dude quickly rose back to his feet dusting himself off and drawing the M16 Assault Rifle he had strapped to his back cocking it in preparation for shooting back. When he turned the corner out of the supply room though Postal Dude nearly received a scolding blast of fire straight to his face making him realize that Hatred Guy had ran out of AK-47 ammo and had now changed to his even more formidable weapon, a large two tanked Flamethrower that had been strapped to his back which Hatred Guy now wielded with a manic grin on his face “burn you fucking worm!” Hatred Guy bellowed sending another stream of flames at Postal Dude forcing him back into the other room for cover.

“Mother fucker!” Postal Dude cursed as he found himself trapped in the supply closet, glancing around he luckily found a back door at the other side of the room shooting off the lock before kicking it open to bail out back onto the Mall’s floor outside the Pound. He could have just ran right then and there to ensure his survival but he couldn’t just leave Champ to his fate, circling back to the entrance of the Pound Postal Dude found Hatred Guy making his way to where the animals were kept obviously enraged by the constant noise coming from that direction.

Raising his M16 Postal Dude fired several rounds at Hatred Guy hitting him a couple of times in the shoulders with the rest narrowly missing although one managed to nick one of the tubes of his Flamethrower causing gas to steadily escape. “So the worm refuses to lay in the dirt and die” Hatred Guy spat before turning around and charging at Postal Dude blasting flames as he did so, the damaged pipe causing the Flamethrower to malfunction slightly putting out much smaller flames because of the reduced gas flow allowing Postal Dude to simply back track out of the way firing back wildly in retaliation.

Grunting as several bullets struck him in the arms and sides Hatred Guy proceeded to dump his Flamethrower deeming it useless before drawing his Combat Knife and launching himself at Postal Dude as he reloaded, barrelling him over causing him to drop his M16 to grab the larger man’s arm as he tried to stab down into his head. Straining against Hatred’s guys much stronger arm Postal Dude began to sweat heavily as his Knife steadily got closer to his head gritting his teeth as he felt the tip of the Blade press against the skin of his forehead. Feeling his arm weaken Postal Dude scrambled his free hand around to try to find anything to fight back with eventually grabbing hold of a pair of Scissors he had thrown earlier stabbing it wildly into Hatred Guy’s shoulder before jamming it into his neck, not deep enough to cut the jugular but enough to make the taller man recoil in pain allowing Postal Dude to kick him off with a strong boot to the stomach.

The escape plan quickly proved to be far from perfect though as soon as Postal Dude rolled over to get back onto his feet he felt the piercing agony of the Combat Knife being driven into the back of his leg “fucker!” he snapped starting to kick at Hatred Guys face until he finally recoiled back again only for the larger man to drag him back and force him onto his back raising his Knife up high. Grabbing Postal Dude by the throat Hatred Guy readied his Blade over his head again to end his life when loud frantic barking drew his attention back to the Pound, he had thought that he had slaughtered all the animals along with the people but turning his head he noticed in the doorway to the back one cage remained with a Pitbull Terrier inside.


Snarling at his mistake Hatred Guy proceeded to drive his Knife into Postal Dude’s shoulder making the smaller man exclaim in pain before rising to his feet “you can die slowly” he growled convinced that the wound he had inflicted was enough to make his victim bleed out as he started to walk back into the Pound drawing another Grenade from his trench coat “the mongrel can die first”.

“Get the fuck away from my dog!” Postal Dude barked as he forced himself to sit up pulling out another Molotov and lighting it before throwing it at Hatred Guys back. The flaming bottle hitting the larger man square between the shoulders causing his coat to burst into flames instantly making Hatred Guy cry out with agony as his skin immediately started to burn and smoulder.

His cry of pain didn’t last long though as it quickly turned to cold maniacal laughter “so this is what it’s like to burn” he chuckled darkly turning back to Postal Dude spreading his arms wide “you’re giving me what I fucking want, you’re merely preparing me for Hell” he sneered pulling the pin of his Grenade “and you can come to Hell with me!”.

Just as he was about to launch himself at Postal Dude to kill them both with the Grenade Champ threw himself at his cage door shattering the old lock before charging at the psychopath, jumping up to bite down on his arm forcing him to drop the Grenade which went off a few feet away after hitting the ground sending Hatred Guy flying across the room along with Champ. “Champ!” Postal Dude cried out seeing his Dog hit the wall hard before falling in a heap on the floor, ignoring the sharp pain in his leg he forced himself up to his feet dragging the Combat Knife out of his shoulder before lunging at Hatred Guy as he staggered to his feet.

Impacting hard against Hatred Guys back Postal Dude barely made the larger man stumble before he didn’t care, stabbing wildly at his enemies neck and shoulders making the psychopath curse and snarl with pain and fury reaching back and grabbing at him “this is what you get for hurting my dog!” Postal Dude growled aiming to ram the Blade into the back of Hatred Guys skull only for the larger man to reach back just in time to block the stab getting the Knife straight through his hand making him exclaim and elbow Postal Dude hard in the side sending him flying off of him.

Wrenching the Knife out of his hand Hatred Guy tossed it aside as the Blade broke off from the hard pull turning around to find his dropped AK-47 laying just outside the Pounds doorway. Deciding that his target had been breathing long enough he made his way towards the Rifle only to exclaim as a bullet tore through his shoulder shortly followed by another one blasting itself way through his knee cap sending him crashing to the floor. Upon landing Postal Dude had luckily been thrown right next to his discarded Pistol and was now unloading the rest of the clip as he rose to his feet firing bullet after bullet into Hatred Guy until the clip ran dry.

When the gunfire stopped Hatred guy spat out a wave of blood slowly collapsing to support himself on his elbow as his free hand held the bullet wounds on his stomach “so it finally ends” he wheezed rolling over to sit against the glass barrier that prevented people from falling over the edge to the floor below “at long last”. Coughing up another wave of blood Hatred Guy then let out a loud maniacal laugh grabbing the pins of his remaining Grenades pulling them all out to go out with as much destruction as possible.

“Oh no you fucking don’t!” Postal dude growled running up to deliver a powerful kick to Hatred Guy’s chest shattering the barrier behind him and sending him sailing over the edge to the floor below, his body hitting the ground with a sickening ‘crack!’ before his Grenades went off destroying his body in a fiery explosion. “Fucking psycho” Postal Dude spat over the edge onto the blackened mark that now stained the lower floor before turning to check on Champ, happy to find that the Dog had luckily survived and was now limping up to the edge where he stood cocking his leg to relieve himself onto the mark below “good boy”.

Winner: Postal Dude

Whilst Hatred Guy had sheer physical force behind him being taller and bulkier than the much slighter Postal Dude his suicidal nature prevented him from fighting smart whilst Postal Dude’s will to survive prevailed (I know you can suicide in Postal 2 but that’s not the goal of the game).
DWOAH: Postal Dude vs Hatred Guy
The fifteenth of my fan made Deadliest Warrior battles

In these I will be pitting my chosen warriors from all of history, be they real or fictional

The fifteenth battle: Postal Dude (Postal series) vs Hatred Guy (Hatred)
If Dragon age: origins and Dragon age 2 characters worked together banter

Loghain and Merrill

(After Loghain is recruited)
Loghain: so I am to work with both a Grey Warden and a Savage, the Maker must hold a grudge against me
Merrill: excuse me?
Loghain: I had thought the Dalish had known better than to interfere with human affairs but with you here it’s obvious that they’ve decided to get involved
Merrill: I am here out of my own choice, my own Clan is far away and safe from the Blight
(If the Warden sided with the Dalish or made peace between the Elves and the Werewolves)
Merrill: anyway the Warden/Mahariel has already recruited the help of the Dalish from the Brecilian Forest, surely you cannot turn down such aide simply because they’re Dalish
Loghain: as long as they know their place on the battlefield I will tolerate them
Merrill: my people are more civilized than you think
Loghain: that is yet to be seen
(If the Warden sided with the Werewolves against the Dalish)
Loghain: well it seems that the Warden him/herself knew not to trust your kind, although I can’t say the beasts he/she sided with are much better
Merrill: Zathrian was causing his own Clans suffering through his own stubbornness and hatred, though I cannot approve of the Warden’s/Mahariel’s actions I cannot say anything in Zathrian’s defence
Loghain: I’d rather you never say anything at all

(Random banter)
Loghain: so you’re a savage and a Malificar, just wonderful
Merrill: are you talking to me?
Loghain: I don’t see any other Blood Magic using, Demon worshipping savages around
Merrill: I don’t worship Demons! I just don’t fear them
(If Merrill’s personal quest hasn’t been completed)
Merrill: anyway I’ve found one willing to help mortals so not all Demons are evil
Loghain: I highly doubt that
(If Merrill’s personal quest has been completed)
Merrill: I’ve dealt with a Demon before, I know now not to trust them
Loghain: I’ve heard, at the cost of your precious Keeper, at least now you’re at least a slightly less detriment to the group
Merrill: *shocked gasp*
(If Varric is in the group)
Varric: enough Greasy, I mean it
(If Carver is in the party)
Carver: one more word Loghain, just one more I dare you
(If Isabela is in the party)
Isabela: soft spot Loghain, stop it
Loghain: *scoffs*

(Random banter)
Merrill: why do you hate Elves Loghain?
Loghain: they ask inane questions to start
Merrill: you can’t hate all Elves simply because I ask questions
Loghain: Elves have got it in their heads that they deserves as much as humans whilst making it blatantly obvious that they had no wish of coexisting peacefully among us, they either whine constantly about being ‘second class’ or swan around acting like they’re the Makers gift to the world
Merrill: surely not every Elf you’ve met has acted in such a way
Loghain: let’s have a look at our Elven ‘friends’ shall we, the Antivan tries to have sex with everything that moves, me included after the other Dwarf let him try one of his alcoholic mixtures the other night, Fenris refuses to shut up about how he used to be a slave and then there’s you, a deluded little Malificar who misguided grandeur about reclaiming your kinds great past
(If the Warden is Dalish)
Loghain: and also there’s the Warden who….well she’s a Warden so there’s very little positive I can say about her
Merrill: I don’t know why I try talking to you
Loghain: neither do I

(Random banter after Varric points out Loghain’s hair)
Merrill: have you thought about doing something with your hair Loghain?
Loghain: you’ve been speaking to the Dwarf again haven’t you?
Merrill: of course I’ve been talking to Varric, he’s my friend
Loghain: that’s not what I meant Savage, I meant…oh why bother?
Merrill: I was thinking that maybe with a few more braids it would really tidy your hair up
Loghain: my braids are fine as they are
Merrill: maybe a couple of flowers? I put some daisies in Sten’s hair once and it brightened his appearance right up
(If Sten is in the party)
Sten: I only participated in such actions to prevent town’s people from fearing me so it would be easier to gain supplies
Merrill: yes of course that’s the reason *whispers* he enjoyed it, he smiled, it was creepy
Loghain: you are not putting flowers in my hair
Merrill: can I at least comb it?
Loghain: no
Merrill: but….
Loghain: no!
Merrill: *sighs* ok, if you say so

(Random banter in the Brecilian forest)
Loghain: *disgusted noise*
Merrill: is something the matter Loghain?
Loghain: how could you Elves live in such a manner?
Merrill: well for one we normally avoid the piles of Halla droppings
Loghain: but the dirt everywhere, the insects, it’s intolerable
Merrill: I thought you fought at the River Dane? That’s what I was told, wasn’t it dirty there?
Loghain: yes but that was a battlefield, everyone was too focused on killing their enemy than on how much filth was coating their bodies, here you live in this
Merrill: the Dalish don’t spend their days rolling naked in the mud Loghain, we are quite civilized if you took a moment to look into our culture
Loghain: I’d rather not get involved in such matters, Dalish and human relations are strained for a reason
Merrill: because humans are unwilling to reach out to us
Loghain: yes and the countless human bodies riddled with Dalish Arrows aren’t a factor at all
Merrill: you’re impossible to talk to
Loghain: and yet you still try
If DA: Origins and DA2 characters worked together
The fourteenth of what I hope will be several of fan made dialogue scripts between the DA: origins and DA2 followers

This time it's Loghain and Merrill, with Merrill being Merrill she would of course try to be nice to Loghain who obviously has a poor opinion of Elves since he approves of Alienages and is more than willing to have slavers work in Ferelden if they only target Elves so would obviously be not so nice back


Artist | Hobbyist | Photography
United Kingdom
Hey everyone I'm Adam :). I joined this site to enjoy many peoples artwork as I lack the skills and equipment to produce real art myself. I live by generally liberal beliefs as in peace to all mankind and all that, quote facism to me and I will raise hell. So I hope to enjoy many pictures and webcomics on this great site and if anybody reading this makes an artwork I like you'll hear from me ;).

Current Residence: Hull, England
Favourite genre of music: Metal
Favourite style of art: Fanart and webcomics
Favourite cartoon character: Gir from Invader Zim
Personal Quote: "Whenever I open my mouth complete and utter bollocks seems to fly out"

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